Lazy sunday morning
by MarciaGLima
Summary: El gets her period and Hopper freaks out a little


It was quite a lazy Sunday morning at the Hoppers household. Eleven was still asleep as far as Hopper was concerned and he was preparing some Eggos for breakfast, sipping quietly from a cup of coffee. Sunday mornings were his favorites, because he didn't have to go to work and Mike usually only came to pester them much later into the evening since Sunday was usually the day his family went to visit his nana. It was perfect because it was only Hopper and his daughter, just like the old times, before she started dating that lanky little prick. They usually sat on their tiny table and had breakfast together, talking the minimum possible as always, and then they went to sit on the couch to watch some tv, skipping the cartoons and instead watching re-runs of procedure shows. He was still amazed by how much El liked watching Miami Vice.

He had just finished the Eggos when he heard the scream that set him into motion faster than a bullet. He grabbed his gun from the living room table and in less than a second he was outside the source of were the scream had come from, the bathroom.

"EL!" He yelled, trying the doorknob and finding it locked. "WHAT'S WRONG? LET ME IN!"

"GO AWAY!" She yelled back in a stuffy voice, letting Hopper know that she was crying.

"LET ME IN! ARE YOU HURT?" He yelled back. "I'M GONNA BREAK THIS DOOR IN IF YOU DON'T OPEN THE DOOR RIGHT THIS INSTANT!" He warned and he was serious, he was ready to do it when the door was unlocked and opened, revealing a puffy eyed El. She didn't look physically hurt so Hopper sighed in relieve and put his gun away in the back of his pants.

"What happened?" He asked, this time in a more moderated tone of voice. Eleven was still in her pajamas and her hair was still uncombed. She looked utterly miserable, however and Jim could feel his heart clench at the sight of his distressed child.

"Something happened." She muttered, somehow not able to look him in the eyes.

"Well, I can see that!" He responded. "What happened?" He asked again.

"I'm bleeding." She said and Hopper's eyes bugged out. He examined her throughout, looking her up and down and not finding any blood. He especially looked at her nose, but it wasn't bleeding either. Even if her nose was bleeding that would not warrant a scream or the tears, because she was quite used to it.

"Where?" He asked, feeling confused. He could see Eleven's cheeks flushing with color and then she stared at him, like willing him to hear her thoughts because she was unable to utter any response.

Hopper was not proud to admit that it took him a while to understand, staring blankly at his daughter's face but when the realization came upon him, he also felt his cheeks burning up.

"Oh." He said, not being able to say anything else. Hopper could feel his palms sweeting in nervousness.

"Am I dying?" Eleven asked in distress, looking worried and troubled.

"No, no!" He said frantically, gesticulating towards her and stopping just short of touching her upper arms. "It's completely normal!" He squeaked out, now feeling the sweat gathering at his temples. Hopper was feeling completely out of his depth, which was not a new feeling in regards to dealing with El.

"Normal?" She looked up at him with a little frown in the middle of her eyes.

"Yes, it's…" He felt his throat close up and he swallowed dry so the words could come out. "You're on your period." He choked out, feeling his voice squeak like he was a pre-pubescent boy instead of a forty year old police officer.

"Period?" El asked and Hopper realized that he would have to explain to her exactly what a period was and how it happened, since his daughter probably didn't had anyone to explain it to her growing up. It was in moments like this that Hopper wanted to kill all over again that bastard that had incarcerated his daughter for so many years, depriving her of a normal life.

"If I'm going to explain this to you, I'll need to be a lot drunker." He said as he coaxed her out of the bathroom. "C'mon kid, let's eat some breakfast."

As Hopper guided El to the kitchen with a gentle hand on her back, he eyed the phone on the wall and had the brilliant idea to call someone who could handle this a lot better than he could. It took 5 minutes to convince Joyce to come over to his house and he was aware it would take longer to convince her if it wasn't something to Eleven. The infuriating woman loved to make him beg and drive him crazy but she did anything to El in a heartbeat. Hopper didn't know if it was appropriate to be jealous of his own kid.

When he walked back to the kitchen, El was already seated and eating her Eggos so he opened the fridge and grabbed a beer, sitting across from her and staring at his daughter like she had grown another head overnight. He cracked the beer open and took a long gulp from it, steeling himself for this conversation.

"I called Joyce." He started and she looked up at him. "She's gonna come over and bring some supplies for you."

"Supplies?" She asked.

"Yeah, for the…" He gulped down more of his beer. "The blood."

"And she's going to explain what is happening to me?"

"No, she told me that I should explain it to you." He huffed. "She told me and I quote, "You're not going to pass this responsibility to me, so grow a pair and talk to your daughter about her reproductive system." So I'll explain the basics to you and later when she gets here, you can ask her the more detailed questions ok?"

El just nodded so Hopper inhaled deeply and exhaled, drinking the rest of his beer in one single gulp, like it was a shot. He felt like he was going into battle.

When Joyce got there an hour later armed with two convenience store bags, both Jim and El looked like they had gone through a blender and were sporting shell-shocked faces. If she didn't knew what had happened she would have thought that both were in vegetative states. "Are you two okay?" She asked with an amused smile.

"Debatable." Hopper answered. "Thank God you're here."

Joyce rolled her eyes at him. "Stop being so dramatic." She huffed. "I hope you haven't scared this poor child for life." She waggled a finger at him.

"Well, you were the one that told me to handle it!" He gesticulated in frantic motions.

"I told you to handle it with care!" She exclaimed back and then huffed, placing her thumb and forefinger on the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache coming. "Doesn't matter. El, honey, would you please come with me to your room?" She asked the girl in a soft voice and El nodded, walking towards her bedroom. Hopper got up from his seating position but Joyce placed a hand on the middle of his chest, stopping him in his tracks. "You've done enough. This is more of a girl talk now." He looked down at her and she sighed. "Do not look at me with those puppy dog eyes, Hop." She warned. "You stay here. And no eavesdropping!" She said with a poke of her finger on his chest. Joyce Byers was a foot shorter than him and she still could inflict God's fear into his heart. Hopper was aware that he was completely and utterly whipped. He blinked and she was gone, walking away to his daughter bedroom and closing the door behind her.

Hopper did the only sensible thing. The opened his fridge and picked up another beer.

Three hours later, when he had been dozing off on his armchair with the TV on some crappy show, Joyce slipped out of Eleven's room and closed the door behind her, this time sans plastic bags. "Everything is in order." She said as she watched him turning off the TV and placing the beer that had been on his hand on the table in front of him.

"What took you so long?" He asked.

"Well, I had to explain to her how to put on a pad, how to heat up a hot water bag, how to take cramp meds, what to expect of a period and the days before and after it…" She sighed. "Believe it or not, it's a lot to take in."

"Thank you for coming over." He said in a sigh of relief. "I don't know what I would have done without you."

"You would have been fine." She made a dismissive hand gesture. "You actually covered the basics pretty good. I am impressed."

"Thank you, I am not completely useless when it comes to women." He said smugly and she snorted.

"Oh Gosh, shut up." She rolled her eyes and sat down on his lap, cuddling up to him as he wrapped his arms around her. They stayed silent for a moment, just enjoying each other's embrace.

"I can't believe she got her period." He whispered. "She was a child like a minute ago."

"She'll always be your child." Joyce muttered against his neck.

"I know, but they're growing up so fast." He said and she nodded.

"I know what you mean. Will is taller than me now."

Hopper snorted. "A Hobbit would taller than you, Joyce."

She swatted at his chest playfully. "Hey!"

They dissolved into a puddle of giggles after that, not being able to contain themselves.

"Oh God." He groaned, looking up at the ceiling. "I thought something was deeply wrong earlier. I was ready to break into the bathroom door to get to her, guns blazing."

"You're a good father, Jim." She said softly and he looked at her with a gentle smile.

"And you're an excellent mother." Then he smirked. "And an even better girlfriend."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Is that so?"

"Yes." He nodded.

"It's funny you should mention this because I left the sex talk out of my lessons to her, so you have that to look forward to." She said with a shit-eating grin.

"JOYCE!"

Joyce's deep laugh was all Eleven heard from under the covers in her bedroom.


End file.
